> Lexa: Hop onto your laptop. Talk to some friends. Maybe mine some bitcoin while you're at it.

Lexa hops onto her laptop and opens Pesterchum; her wallpaper is visible, along with icons carrying inscrutable gibberish titles. She opens up a window with the user greenGangsters, who resides in her troll slum.

You have no idea what BITCOIN is, since the abstract narrative medium which you inhabit is a bit wishy-washy on which anachronisms are acceptable, but talking to some friends sounds like a nice distraction from the, well, everything. It's a shame most of them are asleep. Stupid time zones.

Open Pesterlog

—— abjectTerror [AT] began pestering greenGangsters [GG] ——

AT: Hey.
GG: ] What's up lex?
GG: [ Been a while.
AT: You mean this morning? <.<
GG: [] A while for me, I mean.
GG: [[ I told you how time works out here, right?
AT: It doesn't?
GG: []] Pretty much.
AT: That's so messed up. How do you do anything?
GG: [][ Well, space and time are pretty normal in the short term and short, uh, area.
AT: (lol)
GG: [[] It's just that if you decide to go for a long walk you might find out that, oh shit, that took you negative twenty sweeps.
GG: [[[ Or you go to sleep and find out that one sleep cycle is arbitrarily the same as moving an AU away.
GG: []]] If there was any kind of logic or pattern to it, I would have figured out by now. There isn't.
AT: You strike me as the kind of guy who's good at logic and patterns.
GG: []][ ... I do?
AT: The binary bracket thing?
GG: [][] Oh, those. It's easy to forget that I'm doing those, honestly.
GG: [][[ This conversation really got off-topic fast.
AT: It never had a topic :P Does that even count?
GG: [[]] Good question. It probably doesn't matter. So what's up with you though?
AT: I'm tired of working on my friend's present and nobody else is awake.
GG: [[][ Oh, so I'm your last choice?
GG: [[[] My species actually has a word for this kind of behavior. I can't imagine you have an equivalent.
GG: [[[[ It's called "rude".
AT: Lovely Usage of Loquacious Zingers there.
GG: []]]] I'm not sure whether I want to know what "LULZ" means. Should I assume that I just got owned?
AT: ^_^
GG: []]][ Did you try aggravating people on the internet?
AT: Yeah.
AT: But it didn't really work.
GG: []][] If you're having problems, you could just ask your girlfriend for help.
AT: OMG don't even start.
GG: []][[ What?
AT: Calling her my "girlfriend" again.
AT: It's actually kind of rude considering that she already has a girlfriend.
GG: [][]] ... uh, yeah?
GG: [][][ Wait, let me guess. That hasn't happened yet.
GG: [][[] Shoot.
AT: Wait that?
AT: Oh my god is Ruby my girlfriend in the future??
GG: [][[[ Yeah. I, uh, probably shouldn't have spoiled that.
AT: dgaosfdhoggsajpoia
GG: [[]]] Hold on, I think I know what's going on. Or went on. Time shenanigans.
GG: [[]][ Two conversations ago, you mentioned Ruby being your girlfriend like you expected me to know about it.
GG: [[][] And in your past, I've apparently alluded to it, but your surprise suggests that I didn't disclose that I actually knew it was real.
AT: Yeah, you've been teasing me about having a crush on her since like two days after we met.
AT: But I never told you about it, which I thought was weird.
GG: [[][[ I think you just did tell me about it.
AT: Ugh.
AT: Well don't tease me about it, okay? Like, I don't think I told you about this, but I'm actually kind of ashamed and I don't like to be reminded of it.
AT: Except that's in your future, so I *did* tell you this just now and you still teased me, knowing it.
AT: Uuuugggghhhhhh.
GG: [[[]] Sorry. It's hell of rude, I agree. But I don't think I really have a choice at this point.
GG: [[[][ If it already happened for you, then I kind of have to sit through it and ride out the paradox.
GG: [[[[] Ugh. That's going to be uncomfortable.
AT: Oh, not really.
GG: [[[[[ Why not?
AT: Because I don't have a crush on Ruby. B)
GG: []]]]] what
AT: It was all a clever ruse.
GG: []]]][ Do tell.
AT: *preens*
AT: Well, ever since you suddenly started teasing me about having a crush on Ruby when I didn't, I was kind of suspicious.
AT: I figured somebody must have misinformed you. But you're not nearly that easy to mess with, so it would have to be somebody you'd take at face value.
AT: That is, future me.
AT: Since then I've just been playing along, waiting until I had a good reason to make that up.
GG: []]][] So why *did* you make it up?
AT: I had the idea to mess with you about it just now.
AT: You were squirming at the idea of being forced to hurt me, weren't you?
GG: []]][[ That's kinda messed up.
AT: Welcome To My Twisted Mind
GG: []][]] Except now I'm going to be forced to cooperate with my own ownage.
GG: []][][ Which is particularly inane considering that I'm giving you the idea for this whole thing in the process.
GG: []][[] So you orchestrated an elaborate joke whose execution results in you getting the idea for it in the first place. I'm impressed.
AT: "Orchestrated" is a strong word. I'm not even really sure how much I had to do with it!
AT: The owns just kind of... exist. Nobody really came up with them at all.
AT: And even if I didn't want to go through with it, I'm still predestined to pretend that Ruby's my girlfriend at some point in the future, according to you. For basically no reason since we'll both know I'm lying.
GG: []][[[ Yeah. It's like the fabric of reality just kind of decides that something happens and accommodates that into its structure, regardless of what anybody involved might want.
AT: Fucked up if true.
AT: I should really finish this present before I fall asleep at my desk, though.
AT: Catch you later? Or I guess, catch you in the past.
GG: [][]]] Yup. See ya.

—— abjectTerror [AT] ceased pestering greenGangsters [GG] ——

> Lexa: Focus on making fetch modus.